Thursday, March 27, 2014


"By this means you will acquire the glory 
Of the whole world"
--- the emerald tablet(circa 5,000-3,000)


I'm a hairstylist
The beauty industry is my home
So with that said, I take a lot of time 
To be well groomed

What does that mean....
It means my nails are done a pedi is important and my body is waxed. 

Thanks to my girl Carrie Bradshaw
And also spending years in the salon 
Environment I've been waxing since the 

But good old Carrie convinced most of you gals to get a bikini wax

Carrie would proclaim many years ago,
"I feel like I'm nothing but walking sex"

It was this famous statement that would launch many of you into the world of the "Brazilian wax" 

We aren't cavemen anymore. All their hair was important for warmth. Keeping warm is no longer an issue. So get rid of it girls 
Some of you aren't even aware it's sooo not in to have it??!! 

Bare it all....

Besides, I'm about to meet my long distance boyfriend, seems like it's the perfect opportunity to see if grooming everything adds a little pep to my already 
Excited fling

Tuesday, March 25, 2014


Let me tell you the real truth of what it's really like being a New York City hairdresser!!
It can Effen suck!!
First let me say
New York is very International anymore
There's not a lot of Americans running around this dang place. 
Little Blonde, white Anglo-Saxon me
Is a foreigner in my own country here!!

Next thing
The foreigners play a mmeeaannnnn 
These MFERS!!!

Fighting, pushing, spitting, cheating, lying
They will throw not only you under the bus, 
But they want you thrown right into the 
Marie Antoinette room!!
Where upon your arrival
Your head is permanently cut off!!

Beotch is nice in the concrete jungle
Take it as a compliment !!
It's sometimes the nicest thing you will 
Get out of their mouths

Lets talk about their pride
Their all very proud of their countries 
To a person from Brasilia it's not a 
3rd world country!!
It the BEST country on the planet
Better than the good old USA

The Russians, lets talk about what it's like to work for the good old Russians!
Get over yourself 
Let go of WW2
Just let it go
Stalin was a freakn 
Narcissist !!!

It's hell to pay here 
Not all the time

If Henry the Eighth was here
Alive and kicking
He would fit right into 
A New York City lifestyle

The saying is definitely true


God bless New York 


This is how I feel right now
Just leave me alone!!



I no longer like to fall in love
I have a trust issue 

I'm not here to fix anyone
And I don't want to be your mommy!
I'm not even here to figure you out

If you need to be figured out, chased or fixed
Or need someone to perfect your business 
I'm not your girl
You should have a brain to figure it out yourself....
I have to!
I wish you all the best, but simply cannot be involved---- I don't have the time, the energy or the inclination 
Your a big boy and getting too old for this
Grow up!!
I am older, wiser, seasoned
When you cross the right of passage bridge you no longer entertain the BS
 I will tell you to keep it moving if I see any 
"Red Flags"

I need to know you are capable and willing 
To fill in your own without looking to me, 
Alcohol, sex, porn, sports, gambling, flirting or any outside things to boost your damaged ego, low self-esteem

This isn't high school and we are not 16
So if you need to cheat, lie, just cause chaos keep it moving

Because I just don't need to entertain you
And your immature mind

It all just comes from a place within ourselves

How hard is it?!
To come together
Be mature
Learn to deeply  love each other??!!

Please remember, I need alone time
I'm fiercely independent 
Have spent a lot of time alone after my divorce
Alone on that park bench in Battery Park City crying, dreaming, thinking, vegging
Trying to figure it all out

I need alone time
To read, go to the gym, do yoga, be with my kids, write, be with my friends

I don't feel it's good to be glued at the hips
There will be some days I will need more time away from you or less time, maybe if you really capture my heart I won't need any..... But then consider yourself lucky 

Please remember this doesn't mean your not important to me or your annoying me, it's just that I've taken the last few years working on improving me, my heart, my soul. Taking the horribleness of all the insanity projected unto  me by complete 
Idiots, people with nooo substance only egos, worried only about their "Image" 
Pathetic humans, conniving, misconstruing, not caring about anyone else but themselves. 

I don't get starry eyed anymore and fall quickly 
I'm not 16 and this isn't high school
You won't come before my kids
Because I'm a mature adult
And they are me and I am them 
And this will always be

And this doesn't mean I don't care for you
You need to respect who I am
And what I aspire to be

I will always give you consideration of your time as well

I ask you this
Can we from here on in agree that our relationship is a no judgement zone 
You are free to be 100% you

All the odd things we both will do
You washing the car every Sunday might 
Drive me insane or hogging all the covers 
Not taking into consideration I might be 
Cold at night

These are things that are sure to surface

My corky ways, your anal stuff, your schedule, how we joke around, are funny, 
Generous, affectionate and the wonderful things we do or we are. 

Please don't ever hold back
Even a bit
Even when you think I'll be offended
Or that I will judge you 

I will tell you this
You will be judged if you cross boundary lines, these shenanigans will no longer be tolerated with me 

If you need to offend me or hurt me
Say your peace and we shall part ways
Don't ever think your getting me back if 
You crossed me or wronged me 
Your no longer worthy of me

If we are going to do this
Things will happen
We are not perfect

But if you TRUELY love me
No one, no matter what 
No one 
Can come between us!

On that note
Lets fight
Because we are not perfect
And it's not normal not to fight
Whoever made that one up
Is an idiot !!!
And Doctor Spock was all wrong!!
His son committed suicide
It's suicide for a relationship to be 

When we are not perfect
I still expect us to care for each other 

Thoughtless words will be said
The bathroom will become dirty
I will eat a bag of pretzels 
Or you will
I don't eat that much
But when this happens 
Lets pause, breathe
Address the issue w/out judgement 
And lets talk

It comes down to what we will tolerate
And if you really love someone 
Don't make me waste my time or yours 
I did that
It's horrible
A time taken away from me
Sooo selfishly 

We are not going to be perfect
If you think we will 
Keep it moving
I'm not the girl for you!!!

My temper is like a thunderstorm 
Usually short, comes on quick and leaves 
Behind some wickedness, known to cause 
But if you love me, we will get past it
We accept each other 

There will be no stonewalling each other
Give space, love and don't fight dirty

Don't feed me any bullcrap about finding something better!
Every day as I stand behind my chair cutting hair I could easily replace you with something better if I soo choose to!
That gorgeous CEO who's always asking me out, the guy that has more money than you, a fabulous education, culture, diversity, worldliness. 

Always ignored, because I only want you 
No one could replace you....
I don't care about his money, his position, his looks I just want to be with you 

I know I will be able to say "no thanks"
I have everything I need in my man and no one can come between us 
3's a crowd in any relationship !!!

I want you to think
I'm beautifully flawed & hopelessly whimsical

Lets just be together
I will make you muffins 
Dinner in 
sit by your bonfire always marveled how you built a fire and knowing I could never 
Do this
I will LUV you for your mind
I've had shallow, no substance
It was horrible!
I will cherish your humor, your wit, your swag, your down to earth happiness

Then I will go off into my own little world, with your presence somewhere near by
As we sit in the same room but in two different mind sets 
I will know we are able to be
But be separate 
You will tend to your kids needs, possibly 
Helping them with a report, college stuff
I might write, read, help my kids as well

Maybe we will be quiet, but content
Later as we walk downtown and enjoy a drink and chat about our life in our high school, friends we have in common, our jobs, the city, Our time in Europe, our dreams, where we want to travel to, 
Because you know we can talk about anything. Our own little world. 

We will eventually walk home, touching hands occasionally because I'm fiercely 
Independent and use to being alone. We will eventually be intimate, bonding us together, two people that just can't get enough of each other. 

As we lay on the couch, I in your arms all 
Snug and warm. You will fall fast asleep as I hear the tv playing a movie in the background I will watch you sleep and 
Breath and marvel at how lucky I was to finally find someone like you. 

If you don't mind, all I want to be is silly, happy. Can we just explore the world, and each other without judgement 
I'm not looking for perfect, I'm looking for someone who is perfect for me. 

Can we just explore the the world, each other, the city, can we make pasta and cookies and memories and love and a life that is full for us. Or a whole lot of I'm not sure yets.....

All I know it's taken me a long time to get to this place..... I'm ready to find out. 


I don't want to be anyone's Rebound
Ever again
I don't want to be second best
I don't want to be played
I don't want to be compared to any other 
I don't want to be the girl your with
Prior to you getting married
Or staying with the next girl... Forever
I want to be just me in any relationship
Free to be who I am
I want you to be free who you are
I don't want to get the feelings there's 
Someone else in the shadows
Or I won't invest my time
There's just no need to
I'll simply  turn and walk away

Saturday, March 22, 2014


Let me say this, I hate rain!
And when it rains in this dang city
I have hell to pay!
Even in the summer it can be cold and damp
And there I am trudging through the dirty 
Streets of Manhattan
Soak, cold and miserable
My only safety net is the NYC underground
But on a rainy day the New York subway system can also be victim to the rain
Yes, water coming in from above
Especially at 42 street, Port Authority
I bought a pair of Hunter Boots
Just like all the other smart girls have
We all wear them
Or our Doc Martins
Either way 
We are outside walking
Exposed to all the elements of each passing season
I hate rain!!

Friday, March 21, 2014


Off to Happy Hour




Did the narcissist that abused you believe 
People really liked them????
Mine did, he believes everyone likes him 
And his new target is the  most well liked around. Not!!
He so sick he believes he has the best girl in town.....
But we all know the truth
Did your narc admit to social issues??
Being anti-social
Or socially backwards???
Noooo friends???
Possibly blaming it on "victim" scenario
YOU! For example!
Or of coarse there's the "sob" story
It's always someone else's fault 

The narc that abused me 
When people got to know him....
He had been fired from jobs, therapists, 
In-laws couldn't stand him
And many in his social circle just find 
Him...... Odd! 
Yes, odd!!

Now, what is it your exactly missing 
Out on by not having this vile person 
In your life???



Wednesday, March 19, 2014


Calling all fathers!
Do ya think you can get this right?!
Ya, that's wut I thought.....


There is no shame 
In being attacked 
By an idiot
--author, a lifetime client



Most #narcissist have that "chip" on their  
Look at me....
Look at what I have, the most beautiful wife or girlfriend
The best car
The biggest house
It's all surface crap
To fill their low self esteem
Their dying inside
Feelings of inadequencey 
Not good enough
Most likely born and raised very poor
From abusive tragic family circumstances 
They long to crawl out of their mental hole of not feeling good about themselves 
So they seek out what they feel is their 
Arrival on the famous stage of life
"Look at me, look, look at what I have"
Oh hum, aren't they just pathetic ?!!
We who have educated ourselves on NPD 
now find much amusement in their facade
And shallow existence. 
Their fall from grace will sure to arrive
Karma is such a BEOTCH
Isn't it???


So many of us coast through life, letting 
It happen to us without giving it much thought to what lies ahead or where we are going. 

The choices you make, make you.

It's important to have direction, to choose 
A life of purpose & intentional growth. 

Nothing could be more important than planning. 



Annulling your ass

Your never going to get over each other
So fly out of here and deal with it!!


Did you ever notice how so few people 
Can actually spit out the words.....
"I'm sorry"
Amazing, they pull the injustices without
Any accountability 
Why am I the only one on this planet
That can say these 2 simple words
Look, if I've done something wrong 
I'm usually the first to admit I've wronged you and will let you know, "I'm sorry"
Even if it takes me years to have that epiphany!!
WOW! Does the Dynamite Bang!
Do you know how many times in my life 
I have contacted someone and told them 
How awful I feel that I mistreated them, wronged them, hurt them!! 
There's a new person on my "I'M Sorry" 
List, they will be getting a note very soon. 
This person never did anything wrong to me, they helped me, were sweet and kind
And always there for me. I'm the one that 
Needs to drop the "EGO" and send the note. 
Is it that hard to say???????


You confronted your Boogeyman 
You grabbed your Gremlin
See how important talking is!
You finally overcame the narcissistic 
Injury of that relationship
You experienced the empowerment of closure


Tuesday, March 18, 2014


When seeking out a good relationship for ourselves we must first recognize the relationship we seek 

Bliss is delightful, but it is seldom a permanent condition

Moments of happiness and joy are to be treasured 

But when they are counterpointed by stretches of despair or heartache or doubt

What sets the bar. 

I know in my own life I let the wrong people infiltrate into my romantic relationships. Out of loneliness or despair.  
I now am keenly aware I have choices and boundaries. 

Lowering my standards has caused much 
Drama, heartache, disappointments. These men will never be no more than rejects in society. Always causing problems. Always in denial, it's them, they will always play the blame game. 

Try to recall those relationships that were 
Most satisfying. Whether it was a close friend or romantic. These less than standard men in my life never had any friends, which should had thrown the "Red Flags" right away. It's not good not to have friends other than your significant other. 

These satisfying, good healthy 
Relationships will help us set the bar & boundaries to outline the parameters of what we need from significant relationships in our lives. 

Don't turn a Blind Eye!

I now can see clearly and "Red Flags" are 
Quickly seen on the service.

I've become acutely independent over the last few years and nothing about me is co-dependent. I don't " need" to be in a relationship to define" me. 

I have plenty of friendships that fill the void of a romantic partnership.

Sometimes I believe my destiny was meant to be alone. Not finding the right man to stimulate my psyche, support my dreams, encourage my adventuresome attitude. 

Most of my romantic life had been wasted on men who just can't live up to my standards. 

As I enter the second half of my life
Can the Universe spin me into the direction 
Of having a TRUELY fulfilling, stimulating life partner. We will see......


Did you ever do this?!
Have an epiphany
Something changed your life
And you started over
Is this your first week
Of your new life???

Monday, March 17, 2014


Have you ever been watching a movie
And the main character comes to the tragic part where someone dies or they lose 
The person they love.......
They start to cry????
Sometimes you gotta runaway to see if 
The person you love follows you.....
The sadness, the heartbreak of realizing 
Their never coming
Is like watching that sad movie


When it comes to any kind of relationship the key components are trust, loyalty, sincerity. 

When dating a Prince Harming you will receive none of these

There will only be a lot of real estate worked behind your back 

A lot of conniving, mismanagement, and bad deals. Like a bad day on Wall Street I suppose. 

The friend or partner shouldn't hold grudges against you after causing soo many shenanigans. Especially if you weren't the person to take the relationship to a toxic level. 

You have every right to feel hurt, sadness, emotional pain after pouring in so much energy into a relationship where there was so little given back to you. 

Having a high tolerance for bullsh*** 
Has got to end!

Learn to recognize the signs real quick 
Red Flags 
Are usually your gut instincts

Put the relationship up for sale
Let the new buyer have the pains of trying to remodel. All in all, it's just going to be a bad investment 

There's no loss or gain with these toxic people 

And Prince Harming can fool some of the people some of the time
But they can't fool all of the people all of the time 

Remember, people don't change 
So the people in Mr. Prince Harmings life 
Aren't getting anything different than you did 

Or their new friends 

Nothing changed

Put the sold sign out and walk away to a new wonderful piece of real estate 

PS. Don't forget to throw the trash to the curb! Tehe



Rebuilding a clientele;
Lets talk about this
If your straight out of beauty school
Or just moved to a new salon and have no clientele this can be as depressing as walking the Appalachian Trail in the middle of the winter!!!

In New York City most salons have enough walk in on a daily bases you don't really need a clientele. 

In suburbia America, where most people live a more routine, structured life 
Building a clientele is hopeful
It can take up to 4-6 months
Or a good year before you start seeing requests 

Your average new stylist to a shop
Making very little money at first 

This can be discouraging and depressing

Yes, I know
Most Americans want to make a ton of money on the job 

But our lives as a hairstylist isn't a salary position

We are starving artists at first 
That unstable income life can cause 
A lot of heartaches

Oh Hell, it's always an unstable life

But it's our passion
And I'd rather stand behind my chair making $25,000 than walk in your miserable shoes and do what your doing!

The highs and lows of the life of an Artist

Monday March 17th

This is how I feel today 
Just sick of this crappy weather!!