DIFFICULT CLIENTS

The Difficult client syndrome only occurs maybe the most three times a year.
You get that one douchebag that thinks his/her hair is that of something really special
And nooooo hairstylist on the planet EVER gets it right.....

Well listen up

This is the one way to get yourself Blackbawlded from any salon

Seriously!

Us hairstylist put up with very little drama

And if there is drama we want to be the ones creating it!

A thorough consultation is the only way to avoid this disaster

But then there's always the client that wants to always create trouble

Never come into any salon and play the stylist against each other!

In a TEAM salon environment we will nab that sh**** in the butt right away

In New York the foreigners always play a mean game and obviously were  never taught the meaning of team in their countries. Those stylist from poor third world countries have the attitude...
One for all and all for one!

But those of us that were trained in the best salon fashion houses on the planet understand the meaning of team

Back to the client....,

Yes, a good consultation is always the best approach
Repeating back to the client is another approach

If all else fails!
Record that dang pain in the a****
And hit replay when they call to complain!
BUSTED!!!

KIDS AND THE SALON

In Manhattan there just are no kids in the salon.
At least not the ones I ever worked in.
I'm sure the nannies take them to some secret kid salon in Queens or Brooklyn
Where the sign on the door says, "We Welcome Children"

How painful for those stylist!

In suburbia America the story is completely different!

The over bearing, micro-managing mother just can't let her little darling make a decision!
And this starts from the beginning....

The latest for suburbia American  moms is to make sure her 18 month old all the way up to teenagers
Are wearing what "she" thinks is the "in" look

Causing us in the fashion world to want to just step outside and have a complete melt down

Like I said before.....

Most of these mothers could use a MAJOR makeover themselves!
Over weight, no makeup, wearing an outfit I'm sure she stole from some poor homeless man

The other day in strolled one of these such mommies
Strapped around her waist an 18 month old who she said was in desperate need of a style

REALLY???!!!!

The look on my face priceless

I'm not quite sure what goes through these mothers minds
He was a baby!
I'm not quite sure what baby fashion magazine he was being offered a job for
But seriously his hair was just fine for a baby

She literally asked me to give him a style

I had to bite my tongue and ask her if I could give her a style before him!

It's the same way with the teenage boys

Now teenage boys are pretty much like that baby......

Especially 14 year old boys.....
They ain't talking!

These micro-managing mothers are certainly loose screws

And they are in noooo position to offer fashion advice!

An 18 month old baby is in NOOO need for gel in his hair

And teenage boys are deaf mutes
But most likely because they have decided to stop talking because mommy monopolizes every part
Of their lives.....
Including every sentence they go to utter
What a better way to get back at that sort of mother......
Let's just make a fool of her she'll never know.....
So they just stop using their own brains

Most teenage boys are wearing their hair either 2 ways.....
Long!
Or whatever David Beckham wears

All day long that's allllll we do......
The David Beckham haircut

The preppy nerds.....
Mommy comes along to make sure and guide me into making sure I only take a half inch
Of his very Ralph Lauren nerdy look. His name is something like Archer or Woodley.
Nice staunch, embarrassing "family" names that the poor child wants nothing more than to commit
Suicide for having such a name and dreams of one day when he can change it to something normal....
Like Mike

But, we are hairdressers and this is the salon life we endure

SUBURBIA AMERICAN HOUSEWIVES

Sometimes when I'm not in New York  I live in the suburbs of Philly. That's what those of us raised in and around Philadelphia call the city.

The most annoying thing for me are the house fraus of the suburbs. Not all of them but most of them are just a dang pain in the a**!!

Their an interesting breed. Most went to college to catch their current husband or their first husband and can be quite well education. Some of these chicks are strapped tight with PHD's but using their prestigious education for volunteer work or just working part time as adjunct professors. 

These less than lovely creatures can be found most days micro-managing their entire home. I'm not quite sure who marries these sort of women but they must be Doing something right most of their husbands seem ok with being micro-managed & bossed around. 

When they enter the salon they now have NOOO idea they have just entered a different ball park! Welcome to hairdresser world where the name of our game is "We are the coach" 

To their dismay their micro-managing skills are usually retained to being banished to the waiting area. 

RULE OF THUMB

NEVER TELL A HAIRDRESSER HOW TO DO THEIR JOB

The latest trend for micro-managing their child's hairdo is nothing short of entertainment 

Usually poor little Brittany or  Josh want nothing these creatures suggest and that's when we gotta step in to mediate. 

I don't mess around anymore with these ridiculous women. Most of them in dire need of complete makeovers themselves!  I also always wonder how these women have left themselves go and still manage to keep their husbands. 

They arrive into the salon with children in hand dressed in their yoga pants or an outfit they wore back in 2001. Never any makeup and usually sporting a version of the suburbia American Classic "mom" Bob. 

I usually find myself wondering...... 

Are there any mirrors in your house

And DO you actually look in them?! 

These mommies are VERY bossy 

They want their disgruntled child to either wear something that the kid at 14 completely does SO NOT want to wear! 

I actually had to tell one of these gals last week...

"He's not eight  he's fourteen!" 

The kid which was a fourteen year old boy actually returned to the salon and said, "Thank you for giving my mom the beet down, she just doesn't get it." 

I sent that broad right to the street! 

I now know my mission in life was to save every teenage kid from their micro-managing clueless mother. 

Wanna talk hair, makeup and fashion?!

Don't mess with your hairdresser!